Response is meaning and self-talk

[KingHenrythe8th]

hi,

i have been thinking about the nlp presupposition 'the meaning of any communication is the response it gets'. i look at people and see a response to my communication and i understand fine that that is the meaning BUT when i talk to myself i am afraid my clairty disappears.

does this presupposition work when we talk to ourself ? i am communicating with myself but is the meaning of that communication is not know by me until i feel a response ? :confused:

[skip]

The presupposition isnt necessarily true.

It is simply more useful to act as if it is true.

That makes you 'responsible' for your comunication, and for adjusting it, if you didnt get the response you wanted.

"I wanted to kiss her (communication) but she wouldnt let me."

"Too bad she prolly doesnt like (insert your qualifier here) guys."

Now that took all the power right out of your hands, didnt it?

How about.

"Humm I wonder what I did or failed to do? Perhaps I might brush up on my personal hygene, and give it another go."

Now that response, that of taking responsibility, even if it isnt completely yours, opens up possibilities.

Consider it in that light.

skip

[Poodle]

Always speak nicely to yourself. You speak nicely to other people so why on Earth would you treat yourself differently? Also, you are the "meaning maker" of your world. If I lived in your reality I would most probably freak out and if you lived in mine, you would too. We each have our own and that is what makes each of us unique and special.

Stay well,
Pood

[KingHenrythe8th]

cheers skip, i have been trying to 'suspend' my meaning until i see a response. so i say something to one of my friends and i dont assign a meaning to that until i see a response. (now i am beginning to project myself further into your reply). so by doing that i havent been gaining any fresh insight into my communication. of course DUHHHHH!!!

your way. know a meaning and try to obtain it if not then i have a difference to work with. change my communication to try and get closer to my original meaning. so i can have a meaning that isnt the response i get. fun and games. now tomorrow i get to witness my powers of communication in a organic, growthful way. wow, am i in for a shock !!! :eek:

thank you skip

[KingHenrythe8th]

Always speak nicely to yourself. You speak nicely to other people so why on Earth would you treat yourself differently? Also, you are the "meaning maker" of your world. If I lived in your reality I would most probably freak out and if you lived in mine, you would too. We each have our own and that is what makes each of us unique and special.

Stay well,
Pood

pood,

yep...the "meaning maker" part you refer to was missing.

model changed.

thank you :D

[skip]

Hummmmm,

I think I would have a response I want, and continue to change my communication until I get the response I wanted.

We have no way of knowing exactly what the communication meant to them, only the response to it we can observe.

cheers,

skip

[Merlin]

Awww...
Does Skippy need a kissy?
http://i30.photobucket.com/albums/c344/Myhrrhleine2/smilies/kissy.gif

[KingHenrythe8th]

Hummmmm,

I think I would have a response I want, and continue to change my communication until I get the response I wanted.

We have no way of knowing exactly what the communication meant to them, only the response to it we can observe.

cheers,

skip

.....and i is fun to know when the response is not what i wanted. i have even started using responses that i myself would not find useful knowing that the person i am speaking to may react differently. its amazing how flexiable my friends are (and myself).

thanks again skip :)