Courage

[David Laing]

Hi all
I'm new to the forum but have been a Hypnotherapist in the UK since January.

I was wondering if anyone could help. I would really like to locate a script for Courage. There are plenty of Confidence scripts around but sometimes a person is CONFIDENT they can do something but lack the COURAGE to actually try. Does this make sense?? I hope it does!

Looking forward to talking with you all in the future!

Many thanks in advance.

Dave

[Terry (existing)]

Hi all
I'm new to the forum but have been a Hypnotherapist in the UK since January.

I was wondering if anyone could help. I would really like to locate a script for Courage. There are plenty of Confidence scripts around but sometimes a person is CONFIDENT they can do something but lack the COURAGE to actually try. Does this make sense?? I hope it does!

Looking forward to talking with you all in the future!

Many thanks in advance.

Dave
Have you tried discussing this with your trainer? I would certainly disagree with you that a confident person might lack courage, but am open to being proved wrong.

[Simple Guy]

Dave,

Is it possible that such a person is, more precisely, lacking in initiative, as
opposed to courage?

[David Laing]

Hi
Thanks for the replies.
No I'm fairly certain about the distinction.

You need courage to take a step or make a change even if you have the desire to do it and the confidence in your ability to succeed.

Courage:
"The state or quality of mind or spirit that enables one to face danger, fear, or vicissitudes with self-possession, confidence, and resolution; bravery."
Confidence:
"A feeling of assurance, especially of self-assurance.
The state or quality of being certain: I have every confidence in your ability to succeed. "

Initiative:
The power or ability to begin or to follow through energetically with a plan or task; enterprise and determination.

All very different. The crucial bit I think is the "enables one to face danger, fear" bit.

Many Thanks

Dave

[Simple Guy]

Dave,

You may want to consider initiative as an actualization of the "power or
ability" you speak of, as contrasted with a capacity to do so. I hope this helps.

[Terry (existing)]

[QUOTE=David Laing]Hi
Thanks for the replies.
No I'm fairly certain about the distinction.

You need courage to take a step or make a change even if you have the desire to do it and the confidence in your ability to succeed.

Courage:
"The state or quality of mind or spirit that enables one to face danger, fear, or vicissitudes with self-possession, confidence, and resolution; bravery."
Confidence:
"A feeling of assurance, especially of self-assurance.
The state or quality of being certain: I have every confidence in your ability to succeed. "

Now here is were we disagree, or at least see things differently.....
Read the meaning applied to "Confidence" and then tell us were this allows for a feeling of danger, fear, et al.......
When you are confident of success, you see no danger of failure, no lack of resolution, and require no "bravery" to help you through the effort required to achieve your goal....Only when you percieve the likelyhood of failure, danger, or death do you need "Courage".........

[David Laing]

Hi Terry
i see your point but I see it a bit like this - not good examples but they will do!

1. Bodyguard needs to protect his charge. He is confident that jumping in front to take the bullet will most definitely stop it and save the charge's life. He still needs the courage to do it!

2. Soldier in Basra is confident he can fight. He is trained and has perfected his technique but stil needs the courage to come out from behind his hide to actually face the enemy.

3. Guy wants to approach girl. Even though he is confident he has good "opener" for the conversation he still lacks the courage to actually do it.

This last one is actually one I overheard from a guy in a pub the other day which is what made me think about the question in the first place. The others fit the mould though.

Dave

[Terry (existing)]

With the exception of the bodyguard example, what you have presented is seudo confidence, not the real thing. As for the bodyguard one, since he knows nothing of what might be the outcome, ie death or just a wound, he will only act out of instinct, since to second guess would result in not acting at all, and hesitation would bring only failure...
I used to teach firefighting to my boy scouts, since I had been trained in the Navy first, and later took a course from my local fire department. One of the boys I trained was able to use that training to save his mother and grandmother from a fire, and then take such actions as helped to reduce damage until the fire truck arrived. NOW, was that courage, or confidence? I would say confidence, in that he knew he had been well trained, had absorbed the training, and was confident in what was required of him.. Now someone who ran into a burning building to save a child trapped there would either act out of lack of knowledge of the danger, a total disregard for danger because the desired result (saving the child) was uppermost in his/her mind, or the raw courage needed to face a known danger, and act regardless of such knowledge.... More often than not, courageous acts result from acting by instinct rather than true courage.....
All too often someone will appear to have confidence when in fact they are fooling themselves in the belief that it will give the desired result even though false. "Fake it 'till you make it" is a quotation that is often used, but very misunderstood......
Hypnosis can instill confidence, but only training can result in a sensible use of that confidence by the way, so you see, there is no replacement for study and understanding, not even hypnosis.......

[TaffyE]

My take is that they are two different things.

As a teenager, I was a respectable diver (as in swimming pool diving), so had confidence in my ability. However, I didn't have the courage to go any higher than the 3 metre board.

[wilkinswong]

"Courage" and "confidence" are very situational. So as the term "Intiative".

For example, I may have confidence in myself in completing a task, but I choose to be low-profile so I won't take initiative to show my ability. Still, I have the courage in completing the task, but no courage in facing with the feedback from others or even my internal "self" because I am not so proactive.

That's my personality. We don't have to change our personalities, but we can change our behaviours in views of circumstances.

Wilkins
Registered Social Worker & Hypnotherapist
Tai Chi therapist

[mariah]

David, would you like to hear this from someone STRUGGELING of what you just mentioned up there? I just saw a hypnotist about it, but he couldn't help me, because he didn't know me and my desires. The reasoning why we fail at being confident in the first place is because we don't think we are good enough. If you on top of all that are having issues such as phobias (take social phobia for instance), it is much more difficult to be confident because you know it can fail *just like that*. The fear is taking control. I personally believe that a booste of confidence can make any phobia disappear though.

How do you like this idea.. I have come up with a scripth for myself about confidence that I am going to let someone else read in for me. That because I'm too insecure about myself to believe in the voice if the voice is indeed, me. Would you consider a "trade" with me? You say the scripth once. (I am sure I can make this repeat by doing some things on my computer), and send it as a normal wav as it will only be for a couple of minutes probably. I will then naturally give you my scripth for you to talk in (if you do have a mic?), and we will both be satisfied. I promise you, if any of your patients are struggeling with courage because of fear and people stopping them, therefor because of confidence, you just found your soulmate. (me) :D

[Don]

" I just saw a hypnotist about it, but he couldn't help me, because he didn't know me and my desires."

Why didn't you tell him?

"The reasoning why we fail at being confident in the first place is because we don't think we are good enough."

Many, if not most hypnotherapists follow the paradigm that everyone is a unique individual and needs to be treated that way. Each person has his or her own behaviors that they wish to change. The reason you gave above may be the cause of your lack of confidence (or it may only be a symptom of something else--only work with a good therapist can help you determine this). It may also be the cause for others. But it is not necessarily the cause of a lack of confidence in many or even most people with that behavior.

Why do you think simply reading a script repeatedly, or having it read to you, will help you?

[mariah]

Why didn't you tell him?

"The reasoning why we fail at being confident in the first place is because we don't think we are good enough."

Many, if not most hypnotherapists follow the paradigm that everyone is a unique individual and needs to be treated that way. Each person has his or her own behaviors that they wish to change. The reason you gave above may be the cause of your lack of confidence (or it may only be a symptom of something else--only work with a good therapist can help you determine this). It may also be the cause for others.
Why do you think simply reading a script repeatedly, or having it read to you, will help you?[/QUOTE]
Why didn't you tell him?

I did, but he didn't understand me. He only argued what I said with his own opinion. He wanted me to see things from a different perspective, but in my opinion the wrong one for me.



But it is not necessarily the cause of a lack of confidence in many or even most people with that behavior.

You're right, it could be chemical inbalance in the brain. But even that does something to your confidence-level. Anything like that can make you feel abnormal and different from other people. Less of worth in a way. Therefor it will affect your confidence as well. Or it CAN. I will use this word from now on.. CAN.

[mariah]

Uhm.. sorry the mess. I forgot to erase parts of it.

[mariah]

Why do you think simply reading a script repeatedly, or having it read to you, will help you?

Why wouldn't it? I know my problem, I know exactly the root to it, I know the lies and the truth about myself and this whole situation. In the same way I know what got me "here" (the roots to it), and it's from/with the same repeatedly though unwished process. Every problem has roots to it. I get back the exact same feelings that I had in the past, and sometimes I don't even realize it. Then suddenly the feeling will come back, just stronger this time. And the solution is right in front of it. I believe my problem lays in seperating what's real with what's only an illusion in my head. Separate the past with the future/present if you want. I don't see how anything else could work better then that.

[Don]

Hypnotherapists train for years to know what to say and how to say it in order to help their clients. Good hypnotherapists, IMO, continue their education throughout their lives.

The problem is that there is a part of your mind--some call it the "critical factor"--that is getting in the way of your subconscious accepting it. Merely repeating something won't change that. Instead, you need to know how to get the information into your subconscious so that your behavior will naturally change. Saying it once in a way that your subconscious will accept is all that it takes to change.

I do hope the system you're creating for yourself gives you the help you need. Let me make one small suggestion--feel free to discard it if you like. Once you get the script you like read to you, do your repetition every day. Promise yourself that you will do it at a specific time and do it every day. But at the beginning, figure out how long this should take.

If it doesn't help you change by then, what will you do?

You ask what could work better than your ideas. The answer is simple: anything that works. If your system doesn't help (BTW, the system you basically describe has been known for over a century and is commonly called "suggestive therapeutics"), what will happen next?

Mariah, if you want to learn the best information available about diets and nutrition, talk to someone who is overweight. They study it, look at it, figure it out, but fail in applying it. Lawyers say that if you are your own lawyer, you have a fool for a lawyer. Doctors usually go to other doctors for treatment and even send family members to other doctors. Isn't it possible that getting assistance from outside might be helpful to you?