My First Hypnosis (success)

[Nonameo]

Hey Guys!

None of you know me, but as you're all hypnosis enthusiasts, i feel comfortable to report my findings here without fear of ridicule.

I've been doing a lot of reading on hypnosis lately and how to induce it etc.. So i decided to try it out on my girlfriend.

She was very skeptical and was only going to "close her eyes and let me talk to myself" - Fair enough.

So i began. I got her in a comfortable position in a chair and i went through an induction. At first i seemed a bit self concious about the way i was talking to her and felt a bit silly when i said the cliché "your eyelids are getting heavy". Once i felt she was quite relaxed i told her "you can not open you eyes. The more you try, the tighter they lock closed". I had an awful feeling that she would just open her eyes and laugh at me but i tried it anyway. At that moment, she smiled and i thought she was laughing but the reason she was smiling is because what i was saying was happening. She was really trying to open her eyes but couldnt! It was a great feeling to know my suggestions were working.

Once i thought she was in sommnambulism (spelling?), i began experimenting a few things. I told her to go back to a happy moment in her life. I thought she would just smile and feel happy once again, but something much more profound happened. She went back to the birth of her younger sister and a tear came from her eye. She was so emotional, i couldnt believe it had such a strong impact. I was literally dabbing the tears from her face. I felt a bit uncomfortable so i brought her back.

The rest of the session i spent trying to trigger senses. A numbness in her hand etc.. These all seemed to work.

Now i'm going to think of a few things i can try next time and i will write them down so i dont forget when the time comes.

My appologies for this being such a long post but as you can probably tell, i am very excited about this experience! I am beginning to feel part of the hypnosis world and can't wait to expand my knowledge (and experience) of this great subject!

Thanks for reading guys.

Feedback very much welcome!

-Nonameo-

[Terry (existing)]

Congratulations on finding exciting results from you efforts. Now understand that you have just found the tip of the iceburg, and with it the tip of the excitment you will feel when you have a real success, helping someone with a serious problem. I suggest you begin to save for your first training as of now, and prepare for what is yet to come. To understand what is before you if you choose to stick to it, I should tell you that you can be taught to produce a trance in someone, in the space of half an hour. Now imagine what it will be like if you progress to a training of say 100 hours, and what you will be able to accomplish then. Now go further, because it isn't over. Continue to study and take more trainings, and see youself at the top of a profession that gives you so my excitment that it is a pleasure to go to work each day, and you feel that you don;t care how long you work because it is so much fun.
The reverse of course is true, with the fun and excitment comes responsibilities as well. You will be playing god almost, in that you will be helping people who have given up and you are their last resort. Yet you can also be their salvation if you are good at what you do. You can also be their last failure if you choose to play with hypnosis instead of training into the therapy aspect and enjoying you life as you help others enjoy theirs.Your choice, and I wish to well, but remember, I am still learning after almost fourty years in the business, and it is still fun as I research to be better and better, just because I want to be the best I can be at any given time, with any client, and dealing with any problem. Some responsibility eh? Of course, if you want to duck all that responsibility, you can try stage hypnosis. Not near as much fun, in my opinion, but we all have our prefferences, and the responsibilities are less onerous.....

[Nonameo]

Thanks Terry, what an inspiration!

Can i ask you a question?

Is there a lot of business for hypnotherapists? My main concern is that there isnt a large enough demand for hypnotherapists. Am i wrong? I hope i am.

Can you give me an approximate amount of clients you have a week? And do you have to turn some away as you are busy? or is it a struggle to find work?

Much appreciated

-Nonameo-

[Terry (existing)]

I am long retired from hypnosis as a practise. These days I do only research for my own pleasure. As for if there is a business in this, it depends on YOU and your skills in a business sense, as well as your skills as a practitioner.
Here in Cagary there are dozens of practitioners working full time in a City of a million persons. Many of them are also Psychologists, but find their hypnosis clients are preventing them from practising in any other field, and considering what they charge, no wonder they are happy....
I would say that hypnosis is as good a business venture as any other, and no better, since developing a clientelle means having many successful clients who will recommend you rather then have to compete with the others in your area. As one of only three life members of the Hypnosis Society of Alberta, I could return to practise tomorrow and have clients lining up, but I rather enjoy my relaxed life in retirement, and have no desire to exert myself beyond what I do with volunteers. Just today, I was asked if I would work with a friend, and because he is a friend, I might be persuaded, but I have so many friends:) Yes I do have the advantage of age, experience, and skills, while you would be starting from scratch, but nothing says you can;t do it part time if that apeals to you. Certainly it is much safer if you need to earn a living immediately. Most businesses require about five years to establish themselves and become viable, and of course many fail also, so you must decide what is important to you. At least with hypnosis you have a skill you can use personally....

[Poodle]

Congratulations! You did quite well. I hope you go to a good training -- minimum 100 hours! Only a couple of comments. We are not God so we can't say things like: Your eyes are getting heavy. That would be something that only God would know. Language is critical in this business. Try saying: I would like YOU to develop a feeling that you have been up much too late at night watching an old movie and ... (It takes you out of the God mode) Also now we work with rapid and instant inductions. You will enjoy them I'm sure. Some are actually totally nonverbal. You could also say: and you may notice with some amuzement and delight that those eyes just want to stay shut (again out of God mode)

For years the old watch was swung above the eyes. Finally someone decided it was sooo much easier to say: Would you close your eyes please. Works every time!

Until you get into training you may wish to look at some of Keith Livingston's products. They are totally ethical and of a great help to anyone that is serious about becoming a certified hypnotist and some even to those that have gone through training too. Enjoy! Pood :)

[Nonameo]

Thanks guys, i'll definately start working on my techneques and put a lot of focus on the therapy side of things, as well as the hypnotic language that i use.

Do you guys remember the first time you experimented with hypnosis? I'd love to hear what you tried etc..

-Nonameo-

[Terry (existing)]

Thanks guys, i'll definately start working on my techneques and put a lot of focus on the therapy side of things, as well as the hypnotic language that i use.

Do you guys remember the first time you experimented with hypnosis? I'd love to hear what you tried etc..

-Nonameo- You want I should go back in time almost fourty years and remember one time over all the other similar ones I have experienced since? Hell, I can;t remember what I did yesterday sometimes; last week quite often; and last year, almost never....:D
Suffice I remind you, you will get out whatever you put in multiplied by at least ten times. I have been rewarded a hundred times over, plus I have saved my own life at least twice....

[Stoic]

2 years ago...
It was a gloomy night, the stars starring down at me, moon grinning, and my friend sitting in a comfortable chair. I was eager to try out my new skill. About 6 hours later, after something like 8 inductions/reinductions, positive hallucinations, arm catalepsy, and lots of adventures, we were so out of it, we didn't even know where we were, it all felt like a 30 minute dream. But then something bad happened (Not related to the hypnosis, just a coincident). Now-a-days I mainly use it for self-hypnosis, I'm getting pretty good at it. But, that was the start of something new, something I never thought would manifest itself in such a way.
I went from a past of chronic-depression/adhd/mpd/anxiety/omw to psychotic/cabinet full of drugs/alcohol/heroin/dysfunctional rebel/cutter/worthless failure to a future holding a healthy functioning motivated happy person that doesn't even socially drink anymore, full of hopes and aspirations, and I'm almost there. I'm not going to say that it was ALL because of hypnosis, however, a huge portion of it was because of it and my better understanding(unconscious) of beliefs and attitudes. I never believed in resurection, now I look back, and I see a dead person alive!
Also, I'm almost done with one of my greatest projects. It has taken many years, and long hours... too bad most people can't see it, and hypnosis has been a great asset. Damn delusions, but I shall passively fight!!! Then again... who knows, everytime I'm almost done with something, its just the beginning... or maybe nothing inside changed, just the display and I'm still crazy... or I was never crazy, maybe everyone else is crazy... ok, I'll stop. Damn nominalizations! Who am I?

The wisdom is worth it!

[debuy_2001]

Just got my first success today, used the handshake induction and gave teh sugestion that his hand was stuck to the table. Worked like a charm.

[Simon]

Stoic thanks for sharing this :) Just do your thing and you will be fine ;)

[Poodle]

I've gotten 3 taken care of with hypno-drugs but I cannot figure out the last as I'm not really sure what I am up against. Unfortunately, it's a trip to the dreaded MD's to find out exactly what it is.

Let the pill pusher get really great at hypnosis and the pills will be forgotten. Now if I could only figure out how to hypnotize a Poodle. :D

[Charlie]

I've gotten 3 taken care of with hypno-drugs but I cannot figure out the last as I'm not really sure what I am up against. Unfortunately, it's a trip to the dreaded MD's to find out exactly what it is.
That is really interesting/fascinating.

....... Now if I could only figure out how to hypnotize a Poodle. :D
Only Terry can hypnotize a Poodle.

;)



__________________
"To YOU I'm an Atheist : To God, I'm the Loyal Opposition......" (quote by Woody Allen)

[Poodle]

Is your "great" project something that I may know a little about? If so, a great big congratulations and well done! You have a heart of pure gold. Pood :)

[Fighting Spirit]

You see, that is what I have always associated with hypnosis, going deep into it and entering a deep trance state, where you are in control by your hypnotist(i.e., can't open your eyes, if they tell you to close it) I don't associate it with simply lying down on the couch, in a relaxed state, and talking to your hypnotist. That makes it no different to talking therapy or counselling.

And I can tell you positively. If you did that with me, I would be able to open my eyes and I don't think I would spontaneously react either(cry etc) because I am always in full conscious control.

If that is hypnosis, then I can't see myself being hypnotised. Not because I am resisting it. Because I know I have a very strong autonomous self.

[Don]

FS, I love your enthusiasm, but please get some training!

Hypnosis has nothing to do with being controlled by your hypnotist.
You can always open your eyes if you choose to do so.
Hypnosis has nothing to do with lying down on a couch.
Although many hypnotists include relaxation, it is not necessary for hypnosis.
Hypnotherapy is totally different from "talking therapy" or "counseling" in that the latter two work with the conscious and hypnotherapy goes directly to the unconscious. Further, the latter two are based on different paradigms and understandings as to how the mind works.

Having a "strong autonomous self" has nothing to do with whether or not you can be hypnotized. If you want to be hypnotized and can follow directions, any trained and experienced hypnotist could put you into trance in seconds.

Merely because you "always associated" tv, movie, and comic book versions of what hypnosis is supposed to be does not make the reality of hypnosis anything like your fantasies. Believe it or not, CSIs can't get DNA reports back in minutes and in spite of Buffy there are not weird demons out to get you--excluding the demons of your own imagination.

[Fighting Spirit]

Having a "strong autonomous self" has nothing to do with whether or not you can be hypnotized. If you want to be hypnotized and can follow directions, any trained and experienced hypnotist could put you into trance in seconds

How do you differentiate between trance and normal waking stage? How does it feel different? What changes occur in perception?

If you're critical mind is still on, does it mean you're in trance?

[Terry (existing)]

How do you differentiate between trance and normal waking stage? You don't, that is for the practitioner to know, since it is they who are using the trance state to get results. How does it feel different? What changes occur in perception?[quote] How would you presume that we should know that? We are not present, and know nothing about suggestions given, or about you in particullar.
quote] If you're critical mind is still on, does it mean you're in trance? Well, if your critical mind is OFF it means you are dead, so you tell us?

[Don]

FS, you're assuming that there is a different feeling or that there are some changes in perception. There aren't.

The critical mind is not "on" or "off," is simply is. There is a faculty that provides a set of services that hypnotherapists call the "critical factor." When you are hypnotized, that faculty is bypassed. We go around it. It's still there. It's still working.

When I give workshops for hundreds of people I let people experience what hypnosis is like without being hypnotized. You can try it, too.

Close your eyes, count to three, and open them.

That's what hypnosis feels like.

If you want to know what it feels like to be hypnotized, watch TV for an hour. That's what it feels like. That's why advertisers pay so much money--because while you're in trance you get their messages.

[Poodle]

Even at a NLP Trainer's Training people did not understand hypnosis well. I don't know how many people asked me where, what's it like, was I really, etc. It was absolutely astounding and IMO shameful as hypnosis and NLP go together so well.

Even being an Instructor of I am known as a difficult subject. Why? People are too lazy to learn inductions. Ask Don - I don't relax! The only way to get me is with metaphors, confusion or instants. This is why we like to say we do not practice relax-o-therapy. The eye lids locked is just the first stage of trance and one doesn't even need to go deeper unless having medical procedures or dental procedures. Terry has worked for I can't remember how many years in light trance -- not much different from normal but he has had amazing results. One of my teachers told me nothing would work if the client were not in somnambulism (deep trance). It's just not true. Trance is trance. Believe me, no one with me gets to lie down on a couch. You sit in a chair. It is my job to put you in trance. It is my job that you know you are in trance and it's my job to decide what level of trance I want for you. If you are receiving relax-o-therapy, then you had better demand your money back. You actually pass through the trance state every 60-90 minutes of every day and every morning before awakening and every night before sleep. It is a natural state for the human mind to be in. Now, how many times have YOU BEEN IN TRANCE?

[Fighting Spirit]

Trance is trance.

And pain is pain. A colour is a colour. Good is Good. Bad is bad.

What am I saying? That things are not black and white. Quite often they are on a spectrum. Getting slapped in the face by a trout is probably painful; getting smacked in the face by a heavyweight boxer, is probably very painful.

I know somethings about trance, and I know a trance where one watches television and a trance where may enter in meditation, are different experiences. If watching television alone was enough, then we would have no need to go to a hypnotist. A smoker could just watch a no-smoking AD, and they would be converted. Obviously, you and I do both know that it's unlikely.

So there must a difference between the trance the Hypnotist induces and the trances you enter in day to day life. This difference must be perceptive.
The OP mentions how his girlfriend could not open her eyes, how she started crying when he asked her to go back to the birth of her younger sister. That to me suggests a much deeper level of trance than one would get from watching television or reading a book.

The reason I am saying this, because I believe there are some hypnotists out there who do practice relax-o-therapy, and call it hypnosis, and rationalise it by saying "Trance is Trance" Which makes it no different from talking-therapy or counsellng. The hypnotist I went to in the past, did exactly that. He put on some music, laid me down on a couch, and then guided me(it was no different to a guided meditation) into deeper and deeper states: "As I count down, you will become more and more relaxed" or "You will go deeper" but the fact of the matter was, I never went "deeper" or became more "relaxed" As soon as that ritual was over, he proceeded to get me to visualise things and go back to my past. But, was not reliving anything. What I visualised was nothing different to what I would have got, if I thought about it right now. He later moved to giving me suggestions e.g, "You are confident" and then it was over.

It honestly felt like, just lying down with my eyes closed, with somebody talking to me. I felt no significant changes in perception. My critical factor was not bypased. Nothing happened.

But whenever I tell this to other hypnotists, they defend it, by saying that's exactly what hypnosis is. What? Closing your eyes, and having somebody talk to you? That certainly not worth £50!

Which I why I need to know, how do I know I have been hypnotised? What are the indicators?

[Poodle]

It is not good professional etiquette to tear down another professional but I'm not really sure you had a professional. Go back to that person and say you want a CONVINCER. If s/he doesn't know what a convincer is, then you have just spent your money in relax-o-therapy. I learned hypnosis when I was quite young in South America. Things have changed a lot. I had not gone back to training and went to a "local" hypnotist. Was told I could not be hypnotized unless I did "belly breathing". I said no thanks and left. Went to a lady and she had me sooooo relaxed I didn't want to move, just curl up and go to sleep. I was also not following her instructions so she told me: You can resist me all you want. I wasn't resisting. She did not know what she was doing.

In Jan. I had a gentleman that is a scientiest that did not believe in hypnosis or the subconscious mind. What a challenge! I used a trance inducing metaphor and 3 separate confusion inductions -- NOTHING but I was slowly sinking into the floor. I finally decided enough was enough and did an instant induction and it was done. It's not good for any of us when someone says: I tried hypnosis but it didn't work for me.

You specifically mentioned 50 Pounds which indicates to me you are in the UK. We do have members on this Forum from the UK that I will personally guarantee will put you in trance and I also know of a couple of others. I doubt if they charge 50 tho. I'm sure it's much more. Now you may know some questions to ask, hopefully. Just know it's not YOU, it is THEIR LACK OF SKILL. If you want DEEP, tell them so. It's not necessary but the client is always 100% right even when 100% wrong. Go defend yourself! Print this out and take it with you! Pood

PS - Way, way in the back pages Skip has posted a link to a video of Milton Erickson working with a lady. Watch it carefully! See for yourself the "signs" of trance and just remember this is Old Milton so it is light trance.

[Don]

...I know somethings about trance, and I know a trance where one watches television and a trance where may enter in meditation, are different experiences. If watching television alone was enough, then we would have no need to go to a hypnotist. A smoker could just watch a no-smoking AD, and they would be converted. Obviously, you and I do both know that it's unlikely.

So there must a difference between the trance the Hypnotist induces and the trances you enter in day to day life. This difference must be perceptive.

Hi, FS.

Okay, I've been very patient and trying to explain this to you. Quite frankly, all of the "knowledge" and "logic" you've been presenting is nothing but resistance to actually getting help.

But let's look at this with a bit of logic. There are people here who have been studying and practicing hypnosis for decades, but you have the temerity to say that you know about trance, implying that we don't. That's just freakin' rude. And if your behavior continues as with many people showing resistance, it may get angrier.

When you go to a dentist, do you tell him or her "I know something about dentistry" and demand a full training in what they're doing?

When you go to a copy center do you say "I know something about photocopying" and demand to be trained in the photocopy process they're using?

I don't think so.

You're statement that I've emphasized shows that you actually do have an inkling of what's going on. "If watching television alone was enough, then we would have no need to go to a hypnotist." That's exactly correct.

But then you make a wild assumption which shows you do not have the knowledge you think you do. You wrote: "So there must a difference between the trance the Hypnotist induces and the trances you enter in day to day life."

FS, it's not the trance! Any of the pros here and elsewhere could teach you how to hypnotize in a few minutes. Rather, it's what the professional does after induction--the "therapy" part of "hypnotherapy"--not the type of trance. Trance is easy to induce. Why do you think hypnotherapists study for months or years before beginning practice and then continue to study throughout their careers? Just to learn another induction? Puh-lease!


The OP mentions how his girlfriend could not open her eyes, how she started crying when he asked her to go back to the birth of her younger sister. That to me suggests a much deeper level of trance than one would get from watching television or reading a book.[/quote}

Why? If you were deeply in love with someone (a type of trance in itself) and that person came up to you and told you to get lost because they didn't love you any more, chances are you would become very upset, perhaps even cry. Where's the induction? Where's the deeper trance?

Is it possible that you don't know as much as you think you do? Is it possible that those of us who have studied and observed trance for years might know more than you? Is it possible your unconscious will keep coming up with reasons that take you away from getting the assistance you need?


[quote]The reason I am saying this, because I believe there are some hypnotists out there who do practice relax-o-therapy, and call it hypnosis, and rationalise it by saying "Trance is Trance" Which makes it no different from talking-therapy or counsellng. The hypnotist I went to in the past, did exactly that. He put on some music, laid me down on a couch, and then guided me(it was no different to a guided meditation) into deeper and deeper states: "As I count down, you will become more and more relaxed" or "You will go deeper" but the fact of the matter was, I never went "deeper" or became more "relaxed" As soon as that ritual was over, he proceeded to get me to visualise things and go back to my past. But, was not reliving anything. What I visualised was nothing different to what I would have got, if I thought about it right now. He later moved to giving me suggestions e.g, "You are confident" and then it was over.


What does hypnosis feel like? What does going "deeper" feel like? How do you know you didn't go deeper? Why do you assume regression is about "reliving anything?"

What it sounds like to me is that you are constantly resisting help. What it sounds like to me is that you refused to allow rapport between you and your hypnotist to develop.


It honestly felt like, just lying down with my eyes closed, with somebody talking to me. I felt no significant changes in perception. My critical factor was not bypased. Nothing happened.

What "significant changes in perception" do you think you should have felt? How do you know your critical factor was not bypassed?


But whenever I tell this to other hypnotists, they defend it, by saying that's exactly what hypnosis is. What? Closing your eyes, and having somebody talk to you? That certainly not worth £50!

Which I why I need to know, how do I know I have been hypnotised? What are the indicators?

And finally, after all of your claiming to know about trance when you did not, after all of your presuppositions that work to prevent you from receiving assistance, and after all of your resistant behavior, you ask something that is really to the point.

With new clients especially, good hypnotherapists, in my opinion, always offer what we call "convincers," proof that you are hypnotized. They are things that if you were to ask, "Was I hypnotized?" the hypnotist could respond, "Remember when I said you couldn't do certain things and you couldn't, even though they were easy to do? That's because you were hypnotized." Ether your hypnotist didn't do convincers, which makes me think he didn't do a good job, or you didn't remember them.

All of hypnotherapy consists of the hypnotist talking and the client following instructions. If you either can't follow instructions, or refused to do so, you weren't hypnotized. From your description, it sounds like you refused to do so.

So frankly, I don't know if hypnotherapy is for you since you choose not to follow instructions. You were instructed to relax, and according to you, you didn't. You were instructed to go deeper, and according to you, you didn't.

As long as you think you know what hypnosis and hypnotherapy is, you will never be happy with the reality of hypnosis. You would need to forget all you think you know. And quite frankly, with all the resistance you're exhibiting here, you would need quite a bit of work to overcome your false assumptions.

Therefore, I suggest you forget about hypnotherapy and find a psychologist or psychiatrist. Yes, it will take years, but eventually you will get over your anger and fear.

Hypnotherapy is not about a hypnotist having power over clients to fix someone who is broken. Rather, it is about the hypnotherapist and client working together to help the client change behaviors. From your posts, in spite of what you say, you seem far more interested in trying to get us to accept your incorrect concepts of hypnosis to be accurate rather than actually getting help.

When I started this post I said I have been patient with you. I have. But I'm not going to train you in hypnotherapy. Nor am I going to waste my time listening to your theories that have no basis in fact and come from your misunderstanding the process. Nor am I willing to help you any further find reasons to delay getting help. As far as I can tell that's what is really your goal, whether you are consciously aware of it or not.

So I repeat, start work with a psychologist or psychiatrist. Good luck on your path.

[Fighting Spirit]

Hi Don,

I know you're trying to help and I appreciate the patience you've shown with me. I know it can sound patronizing to have some newbie sound like they know more about a subject, that you have studied indepth for years, so I can understand the annoyance. However, I am not claiming I know more, I know very little in fact; I am simply asking questions that are relevant from a clients perspective.

I have no wish(at least at this point in time) to train or be trained as hypnotist or to learn the science of Hypnosis. I mean, I don't really need to know the mechanics of a car, to drive a car do I? All I need to know is what I'm sure every client wants to know. I am sure you have seen these questions many many times before:

"How do I know I am in a trance"
"What should I expect"
"How long before I expect real change?"
"How do I know it is working"

You see the problem is, and again I speak from the perspective of a client, we don't know, and we are paying large amounts of money for this service. If for that amount, all we got, is relax-o-therapy or something we could have done at home for free, then perhaps you can understand how cheated a client can feel.

I felt cheated with my previous hypnotist. But I have not generalised that to all hypnotists in general, otherwise I wouldn't still be looking for one. I just got a leaflet recently for a 3 hour session hypnosis, costing £100, including psychic reading and spiritual healing. There is no way I would undertake that, without any minimal guarantee.

To argue from ignorance, "You don't know what trance is" is not helpful. It places blame on the client. We should not be expected to be completely ignorant and unreliable. Isn't my testimony enough, that my previous hypnotist did not hypnotise me? I've entered into a trance-state before, while in meditation. I know when I've entered it, because your perception turns inwards, there is a sensation of falling, a sort of heaviness and your senses become acute. You are still aware of everything around you, but your perception is altered. All of which I am sure you are most familar with.
I wouldn't even say the trance states I have experienced were deep, they were light, probably just a notch above normal, but the difference in perception is palitable.

Well, my perception was not altered. I still was thinking "Am I hypnotised yet" "This is just like a guided meditation" "I can't really visualise anything" Later on, I entered into the same state my hypnotist put me in: I closed my eyes.

I did not resist rapport with my hypnotist. In fact we had struck a great relationship and had a discussion on somethings that interest us. It was not my fault that it did not work. And it's unfair to suggest it is. I can understand if the client is being difficult, but this was not case with me. On the contrary, I submit myself to him, and did not have any limiting beliefs about hypnosis: I believe it worked.

Anyway thanks for the advice on Convincers. That is exactly what I was looking for. Something to be sure that the process is working.

Poodle, I will check out those videos as well.

[Don]

FS, you're not my client so I am not putting blame on any client. You're here as a poster who, contrary to what you're now writing, claimed he knew what a trance was when it was clear that he did not. That's not putting the "blame" on anyone, it's simply stating the fact.

You see, sometimes you know what you know or you know what you don't know. Sometimes you don't know what you do know or don't know what you don't know. And sometimes, everything you know is wrong. This isn't directed at you specifically, but at the generic "you." It means everyone including you and me.

You still think your perception should be altered in hypnosis. Wrong. That becomes a limiting belief and should be overcome during the initial interview with your hypnotist. You described your personal experience during meditation. Fine. That's your experience during meditation. Hypnosis is not meditation, it is hypnosis. If it were meditation it would be called meditation. There are different methods and purposes for meditation than for hypnosis. They certainly are related, IMO, but they are not the same and the experience is not the same. I could take a trip to Disney World in Florida or to Nigeria in Africa. Both are trips, but neither the flight nor the experience would be the same.

You still say you didn't resist rapport with your hypnotist. From your post, you are wrong. There is far more to rapport than you know. A trained hypnotherapist should be able to pick up on the signals of rapport. It's not up to clients to know any more about this than they need to know what pneumococcus bacteria looks like to learn from their doctor that they have bacterial pneumonia.

As I wrote before, forget blame. It's just what is. If anyone's responsible for the lack of rapport, IMO, it's the hypnotherapist who should know what to look for and should change methods in order to achieve rapport.

Here are your direct and fair questions and my responses:

1) "How do I know I am in a trance"

You probably won't. You and your hypnotist will both know you are hypnotized when a "convincer" proves to you that you "can't" do some easy task, although you know that if you wanted to do so, it would be easy for you to do.

"What should I expect"
During the hypnotic trance you should expect nothing. Chances are you will feel relaxed, but that is not necessary. A person may be deeply hypnotized while standing. When the hypnosis is over you should feel great, perhaps as if you've had a refreshing cat nap. You also should know that the change has begun. You may not see it immediately, but it will inevitably alter you, changing unwanted behaviors into desired behaviors.

"How long before I expect real change?"
Every individual is different. We're working with minds, not auto parts. We don't take out an alternator and replace it with a new one and the body, like a machine, is instantly different. That may happen, or you may see the changes relatively quickly or slowly take place. As a general rule (which may not always be valid), if you are not seeing some changes after your 3rd session, you should discuss it with your hypnotist. If you are not seeing major changes after your 6th session, you might look for another hypnotherapist or an alternate healing modality. Again, this is a general rule and may not always apply.

"How do I know it is working"
By the results. For example, if someone goes to a hypnotist for smoking cessation, they know it works when they don't smoke.

You claim you are paying "large amounts of money." Really? Price out two years of therapy with a psychologist or ten years with a psychiatrist. Now THAT's large amounts of money! In fact, Freud purposely designed psychoanalysis to take long periods of time and cost a great deal of money because he wanted to earn big bucks and was a failure as a hypnotist.

When a person goes into surgery to remove a cancerous tumor, what sort of guarantee does that person receive? Ask the surgeon if he will guarantee that the cancer will be gone and never return and expect him to laugh in your face. Why do you demand that a hypnotist--who is only earning 1/1000 of that surgeon, should give you a guarantee while the surgeon needn't do so?

Wow. That hypnotist is earning an entire £33 per hour! How dare he! He's asking as much as a plumber or brick layer. And all he's trying to do is help me change my life forever while the plumber is actually going to stop a leak. Of course, out of that £33 the hypnotist also has to pay for advertising, offices, record keeping, continued training, general overhead, and taxes.

Frankly, I don't see how that hypnotist can stay in business at that rate. I would charge at least 2-3 times that or move to an area where clients can afford it and understand that compared to psychology and psychiatry it is a bargain. I know hypnotists who are charing 30 times that much and are turning clients away. And none of them offers any guarantee.