View Full Version : Rapport
Hello I was just wondering how effective people find mirroring to gain rapport? Please give your views
Merlin
06-04-2004, 07:24 PM
If done right it works incredibly well.
But I don't bother.
It takes too much time.
Annie
06-04-2004, 09:21 PM
Most people asking/paying for (harmless) Help in achieving their goals, want the *easiest/fastest* way of doing so.
Look beyond "mirroring" for that.
Annie
Thanks for your comments. The reason I asked is that I find mirroring,at times, useless. I can pace and then lead successfully but Im absolutely sure I am not in rapport. Has anyone ever had any real success with mirroring? because I know in theory it is brilliant but has anybody ever been able to get rapport on a frequent basis?
Thanks in advance and also Id like to say this is not intended to be an insult to mirroring or NLP
j0hnny#
06-06-2004, 04:22 PM
My suspicion is that it only works well when made second nature - i.e. with a minimum of conscious effort...... like most things, perhaps... and probably (though this won't help:D) without thinking too much about its function
Merlin
06-06-2004, 04:31 PM
Consider,
about 97% of communication is non-verbal, physiological.
The easiest method, therefore is to elicit a complete state, anchor their state for convenience, then proceed to match the state, rather than matching a single aspect such as breathing or eyeblinking.
oznlp
06-24-2004, 09:57 PM
Gedday
Re; the oft touted "97% of communication is non-verbal". Not entirely true. This forum is in fact an excellent example of that fact. There is something of a lack of para-verbals and non-verbal communication happening here.
It could be truer perhaps, to say that in verbal communication, 97% of the emotional content is non-verbal.
But if I wanted to communicate to you how much I wanted you to pay for a second hand bike I suspect that verbal communication is primary.
To get across what I want for dinner is also primarily verbal.
A shopping list (an important communication for me as I live so far out of town) is mostly verbal. Sure the non verbal could be implicated, but it doesn't play the biggest part.
I totally agree re mirroring/ matching being an unconscious skill. Just look around and see it in action, done unconsciously and with effect. All by non-NLPers?
Oznlp