Swish Pattern question

[gchain]

I have combined stuff I read in some NLP books for getting rid of several issues such as:
Bitting nails, after I find something interesting I will do my best to keep learning, have no fear of approaching women, and others.

They all worked, but my question is... how do I know it really worked and it's not all in my head like.. i feel i'm about to bite my nails but then again I get a bad feeling like something's stopping me but at the same time I know I could bite them at any given time.

I don't understand if it has worked or am I convincing myself that it has?

[skip]

I would say that since the problems were 'all in your head' in the first place, it doesnt metter if the changes are 'all in your head' as well.

You are either satisfied with the results or you still have some work to do.

It is as simple as that. Why try to make it more difficult?

skip

[Poodle]

I wonder, really wonder, the reasons you only want to play at learning hypnosis (which was a total disaster written above) and now on to NLP. Do you have a strange belief that you are unworthy of professional training? At least with NLP you are only messing around with your own mind so far. Such a shame to waste a mind.

Pood

[Poodle]

and one of the names of someone having something to do with the movie is: JANE SWISHER. What a great name for a NLPer. What do you do for a living 'Jane'? Jane responds: I swish, all kinds of swishes, I swish everything all around. Giggle~Pood ;)

[Docresults]

I have combined stuff I read in some NLP books for getting rid of several issues such as:
Bitting nails, after I find something interesting I will do my best to keep learning, have no fear of approaching women, and others.

They all worked, but my question is... how do I know it really worked and it's not all in my head like.. i feel i'm about to bite my nails but then again I get a bad feeling like something's stopping me but at the same time I know I could bite them at any given time.

I don't understand if it has worked or am I convincing myself that it has?

Dear gchain,

I am presenting an Organ Re-generation Workshop in the 3rd week of March in the Scalar Wave Chamber in Houston, TX and the way people know that it works is their hair grows back, their spines straighten, teeth reappear or fill in, weight gets lost, health gets improved, eye sight improves, livers re-generate, gall bladders regrow, people get happier relationships, their finances get better.

Just like you it's all in their heads and it shows up in their bodies and life.

That's what we all want, right?

To Your Best,
Doc Houston
BTW if you want a FREE Copy of my updated book (with a forward by our very own Skip 'the submissive' Carson) Click on Train Your Thinking (http://www.TrainYourThinking.com)
(If moderators think the link should not be included delete please)

[skip]

There is even a picture of me in a tux in the advertisement.

I regenerated my front teeth and forgot to stop at the right time.

skip

[MrDigital]

Just got my copy...

Thanks for sharing.

MrD

[xunconscioussoulx]

NLP doesn't make it so you never want to bite your nails again. It's not a spell or a magic wish. You need to take responsibility and become motivated to stop biting. NLP has techniques and ideas that make the process a lot easier after you have enough motivation. For example, if an alcoholic has a propulsion system instantiated into his experience (instead of "installed" because I don't like that metaphor) to feel like garbage when he drinks and feels great when he chooses water instead, then he may feel like garbage a whole lot til it begins to feel good for him again. Essentially he's re-instantiating the strategy he used before the change. Basically, turning the change away and fighting against it. That's because he has no drive to STOP whatever behavior he chose. He may SAY he wants to stop but he may not have enough motivation and commitment to follow through on his end.

Does biting nails annoy you enough for you to stop? If not, don't. It's your life and your only doing it to YOUR nails, unless you're weird and bite other people's nails, not unheard of. But it's nail biting is something that is cutting into your personal life, social life and if you feel ashamed for having a behavior that belongs to little kids, then you can take hold of your life and just STOP. Don't think about stopping, really pay attention to how immature and repulsive it can be for someone to look at half chewed up nails. If you don't feel motivated enough, then you need to supply that yourself. Don't expect NLP to magically cure you and have you take little or no responsibility. Just do it my friend. . .

[Poodle]

For what reasons would a person want the gallbladder back? Seems like asking for appendix or tonsils back just so we can go through it all over again.

Confused, as usual~Pood :confused:

[skip]

Let me see if I can clarify something here ... about NLP, when done well.

Every behavior you have consists of a series of 'steps' that occur beginning with a stimulus and leading eventually to a response.

And of course these things string together, and network, and cycle on themselves etc.

This entire 'process' may be completed unconsciously. Or it may begin unconsciously, surface to conscious level, and end there, or go back to unconscious process.

BUT ALL begins unconsciously, and takes several steps before coming to conscious attention, if ever.

So lets take a very simplistic response like nail biting and pretend we have uncovered (as a good NLPer would do), the unconscious steps that lead to the unwanted behavior.

Our client comes in, and says they are biting their nails and want to stop. Remember Erickson, "Just showing up seeking help means they have already exhausted all their other resources and are motivated enough ..."

In asking the client something like, "When do you know to bite your nails?" . The client says it often happens when they are late to work, or a meeting, or when a deadline is approaching...

We observe that the client, will self talk (I am late), make a visual (people staring at me coming in late), kinesthetic (embarrassed), visual auditory combo (Boss saying something) , feel more stress, hear a sound ("Whats the matter with you, you are always late?") feel more stress, begin feeling nails for rough spots, find a rough spot because nail biting always leaves rough spots, start examining the rough spot with their mouth, bite rough spot, continue until no rough spots are found, or until pain forces this to consciousness, wherein they 'stop'. Usually to start again momentarily.

That is what NLP would call this person's 'strategy' for nail biting. And they don't miss a step. And there are many entrances into the 'strategy' but once in, it doesn't deviate.

A competent NLPer will recognize the steps in this chain of events, but will not know the content of the steps. They will only perceive it as AD,V,K,V,A,K,AD,K, UNWANTED BEHAVIOR. Unless they ask about it, then they would have the content information about what was going on at each step. The client doesn't 'know' consciously the content either, until the behavior becomes conscious.

And you could interrupt this chain of steps and derail it, or redirect it, all without knowing the content. That is the essence of content free therapy in NLP.

Now that is a pretty simplistic 'strategy', but not entirely unrealistic. Notice that nothing has occurred consciously until we get to the 'pain part', late in the chain of events.

Two huge points here, both will never work:

1. Consciously trying to stop when you notice. This is where the putting of nasty tasting stuff on your nails comes in doesn't it? It only serves to bring it to conscious attention one step before pain anyway. Which generally leads to its own additional stress, "Oh **** I am biting my nails!" and often cycles the chain. But even if it doesn't, the chain is still operating. the stimulus is there, the steps are still there, and the end is nail biting.

2. Shaming the person as the above poster did, in an attempt to motivate, so that they feel guilty, as a result of realizing they are nail biting, wont work either. It comes 'after the fact' in the chain of events, and only serves to add stress, which most likely cycles the chain.

Who cares what happens after it comes to consciousness? It is too late then. AND if they could have done it consciously, they would not be at your door!

So pick a point before it comes to conscious attention, and pattern interrupt the chain, and substitute (if we wish) a new series of steps that lead to desirable behavior.

Now I cannot prevent them from ever being late again, although I can help with that habit too. Nor can I prevent them from feeling stressed, it's part of life. BUT stress doesn't have to equal nail biting. It can equal many many other responses.

I can scramble the strategy, and they never get to the nail biting. If I break the chain, they cant get to the end (nail biting). And sometimes that is all you need to do.

Or you could prefer to offer a 'better alternative resolution' to the stimulus.

I can substitute a 'new strategy', just co op the whole thing, say just before they get to the "Whats the matter..." part and direct it where I want it. That is the purpose of the, "What would you like to do instead?" question.

I want to make something very clear here. You have interrupted the pattern while it is still at the unconscious level, and substituted a new pattern you built with them, so that the 'nail biting' train gets its track shifted to wanted behavior, all before it ever reaches conscious attention.

How can anyone say that this is going to require work or effort on the clients part? The new pattern will operate just as reliably as the old one, and they don't even realize they are doing it. Just as they didn't realize they were nail biting. And it need never come to their conscious attention.

Pretty cool huh?

They wont, realize it unless you have built into the new behavior something that causes them to realize it.

I can remember early in my 'career', people would come to me, with say 'stop smoking' requests. And I would make the patterns shifts. And they would leave. And later I would see them and ask, "How are you doing, still smoking?" They would patiently explain that they stopped smoking immediately after visiting me, but they know it wasn't anything that we did, they just decided to quit on their own, and did so at the time. Now I could 'see' that the exact pattern I installed was still operating.

I knew I did it. But they didn't realize it. Now that is ecological. They got the new behavior they wanted, and it was so smooth, so seamless, that they often didn't even realize they were behaving differently.

So in essence they 'honestly' report, "Try everything until you give up, then go see Skip, and after that you will get what you want. Skip wont have had anything to do with it though."

Not good for referrals.

So I had to start building in a sense of satisfaction that they had come to me, and we had decided on this new behavior instead. I felt that was ethically justified, because they would never get to that sense of satisfaction unless my 'new' pattern was still operating.

The whole point?

You do your NLP work well, and it is seamless and effortless on the clients part. So seamless and effortless, they will not realize that it is what you did that turned the trick for them.

And you can do this with clients, elicit the patterns, elicit and anchor the new behavior steps, install it, all unconsciously, or consciously (much more difficult, because they keep getting in their own way).

Running your brain is ridiculously easy, and damn near effortless, if you know how.

And yes NLP CAN make it where you never want to bite your nails again. If you have enough motivation to get to an NLPer to ask for help, that is all you need.

cheers,

skip

[Poodle]

I missed this one the first few times around. Author had been to a 'semi" NLP Trainer and had not learned about submodalities. He was swishing everything that could possibly be swished and kept wondering WHY DOESN'T THIS WORK? :confused:

I'm left wondering what that 'semi' NLP Trainer charged. :eek:

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Cool game on language, proper language

On another note let's all go for negatives here and what happens to us:

Example: I am NOT cruel. When one says that and steps into the 'picture' what do you see/feel?

I am NOT clumsey.

More examples please.

Pood