Home invaded need input

[body11]

Hi all new to this board. I wanted to get some input from you guys to see if there is any help.. I am 31 years old. Four years ago I was sleeping in my home and five guys in mask with guns kicked my door in at 4 am . They tied me up ( i lived by myself in a house) and I tried to fight back ( i am a kinda big guy I am a personal trainer) I was able to break the rope they tied me up with and fight them back. I could not beat all of them . They duct taped me and pistol whipped my trying to knock me out . They had no luck and I keep fighting until they left. They destroyed my house and stole some jewelry. I had a skull fracture from the pistol whipping and was in the hospital for 6 days.. I was feeling awful for about a year after this happened( could not function and feel depressed all the time) There was no brain damage or anything like that thank God!! Well I started feeling alot better after about a year and met a girl . We started hanging out and at first everything was fine. She had a little boy and I really loved him.. She was a very mean person and treated me awful she tried to hit my with a vase once and was just very mean. This was over two years ago. I was in love with her and her kid so I wanted to stay with her dumb i know. Well she ended up breaking up with me and I was devastated I found myself not able to function and was very depressed ( it seems this affected me worse than the home invasion) Well I am still struggling to get back to feeling normal after all this time after begin away from her and I just cant get over this and it is messing my life up it is ridulous I still am in love with her after everything she has done to me . I keep thinking about her all the time and replaying the memories of our relationship over and over in my mind and really dont have much of a life anymore. I have tried to stop thinking like this because the more I think the more I sink but it seems I have no control of my feelings toward her.. Do you guys think NLP can help me with this .. Sorry for the long story but I have been reading post and there seems to be alot of helpful people on here.. Thanks for any input!!!!

[Terry (existing)]

Can't speak for NLP since I don;t practise it, but hypnosis would certainly be of help. I will leave it for others to comment on the NLP possibilities...

[body11]

Can't speak for NLP since I don;t practise it, but hypnosis would certainly be of help. I will leave it for others to comment on the NLP possibilities...

Thanks for your post.. So you think just hypnosis would be a benefit for me?? I would like to get rid of the emotions attached to these memories so I can move on with my life !! Is this possible to achieve this through hypnosis ??( I am new to this whole concept and trying to do some research to learn more about it )..

[skip]

Either NLP or hypnosis would help, a lot.

Both would be 'fast' too and hence 'economical', as both are 'brief therapy' methods.

skip

[body11]

Either NLP or hypnosis would help, a lot.

Both would be 'fast' too and hence 'economical', as both are 'brief therapy' methods.

skip

Wow that sounds great!! I knew there had to be some sort of help out there.. So what do you advise would be the protocol on something like this ? I have been reading that most hypnotist do not recommend to erase these types of memories ( due to the value of the lessen that was or should have been learned from the experience) but in my case I really did not benefit from anything that was experienced from the events that took place. I used to be a fun outgoing person who enjoyed life and now I find myself suffering all the time totally consumed from the past with my ex girl and unable to move on . It has been almost two years now and I am still suffering .. Is there any situations where it is advised to use some sort of posthypnotic amnesia to remove all this pain and replaying of old memories or do you think the best way is to get rid of the emotions attached to the feelings.. What would be the best to help my situation A.S.A.P ? Thanks so much for any advise????

[Don]

Hi, body11

Unfortunately, it would be unethical to try and decide for you what would be best. That's not because of anything you've done--in fact, I applaud you for making a move! Lots of people won't do that.

You see, just like a doctor who looks at an X-ray for things you (or he) can't see, a good hypnotherapist or NLP practitioner would ask you questions and possibly get responses that would clarify exactly what you need.

Now, the short version of what you need--and what you might tell a potential hypnotherapist or NLP practitioner--is, "I had a horrible experience and it's still affecting me. I'd like to get past it and the problems that have resulted. Do you have experience in this area?.

Now, I've got some great news! Although I'm not going to say hypnotists and NLPers have dealt with your exact situation and events, dealing with issues such as yours is very common. So body11, you are not alone and you could be through this and moving on very soon!

Just as not all doctors specialize in feet, not all hypnotists or NLPers will specialize in dealing with your issues. So ask if they do!

And by the way, I think there are a lot of lessons you might learn from your experience, the least of which being that you might want more secure locks! If you forgot about all of this, you might let down the level of security that is necessary for your area.

Your two years of pain can be over with a few hours of work.

Cool, huh?

[Terry (existing)]

There you go, just one more thing. I suggest when contacting local practitioners you check if they are members of an organization, and also ask who trained them as well as how long ago. Sadly, we have far too many in practise who are unskilled and untrained, and these are to be avoided. Most of the untrained will back off when confronted with such questions, and attempt to fudge the reply. Those who are competent will give straight forward replies...Knowing how many come here who are untrained and in practise, I intend to offer this advice in future to all seeking help.

[body11]

Thanks so much for your reply!! It would be such a blessing if all the pain and replaying of memories can be gone if a few hours of work!! I am so ready to get on with my life and stop feeling the way I do because of some past memories.. I cant stand having my mind control me instead of me begin in control. I am so fed up with laying around wasting my life because I cant get the home invasion and exgirlfreind out of my thoughts..Eveyday I waste I can never get back and it is so hard because no matter what I do I cant escape these thoughts... I am so glad I found this board you guys are a huge help !! Thanks again!!

[body11]

There you go, just one more thing. I suggest when contacting local practitioners you check if they are members of an organization, and also ask who trained them as well as how long ago. Sadly, we have far too many in practise who are unskilled and untrained, and these are to be avoided. Most of the untrained will back off when confronted with such questions, and attempt to fudge the reply. Those who are competent will give straight forward replies...Knowing how many come here who are untrained and in practise, I intend to offer this advice in future to all seeking help.

Good advise !! Thanks for pointing me in the right direction!!

[Don]

Then just one last...uh...suggestion and a request:

The suggestion: Find someone you like to work with and go for it!

The request: Let us know how it goes and how great you feel!

Good luck!

[teadaze]

yeah, good luck
and well done!

[body11]

Then just one last...uh...suggestion and a request:

The suggestion: Find someone you like to work with and go for it!

The request: Let us know how it goes and how great you feel!

Good luck!

Well I took you guys advise and was able to have a session with someone today.. I was able to go into a deep trance ( well thats what the person doing it said) I was very relaxed and while in the trance tears where coming out . I dont think it helped yet. I still feel awful inside . The person that did it said it might take a few sessions to work but also said I should feel some relief right away ( but I didnt feel any better :( ...) I am praying that this will help I cant stand feeling this way anymore... I am so sick of the these memories of my exgirl replaying in my head all the time I am concerned that if this keeps occurring it may cause some permanent mental problems. I have been to a physiatrist in the past and he said I dint have any type of mental illness and was just haunted from past memories.. I know everyone is different but in some cases does it take sometime to really work?? I know it is really not common protocol but I truly feel that if I could just induce some sort of post hypnotic amnesia it would save my life ( as far as having a life again and begin able to move on and function).. Can anyone please give me some feed back on what they feel is the best to get over my awful situation??? Thanks

[teadaze]

Hi Body,
How did you select your hypnotherapist? This is VERY important! I am tempted to say that the majority of people who call themselves hypnotherapists will struggle to help you.
Had I known that you were going in for it straight away I would have advised against it, that is, until you had done a thorough search.

The fact that you have jumped straight in shows how desperate you are to resolve this. Your motivation will help you but you need to be clever about this - take a deep breath and approach this calmly for a just a moment. You will need to ask for references from previous clients who have been helped with trauma. Ask lots of questions and only go with someone if you feel happy with them.

Take out the phone book and ring around everyone you can find. Dont settle for someone if you are not sure about them.

As for amnesia, memories can never be completely erased. You can block yourself from consciously having the memories. They can still affect you though except that you will have nothing to attribute them to...

Please keep going!

[body11]

Hi Body,
How did you select your hypnotherapist? This is VERY important! I am tempted to say that the majority of people who call themselves hypnotherapists will struggle to help you.
Had I known that you were going in for it straight away I would have advised against it, that is, until you had done a thorough search.

The fact that you have jumped straight in shows how desperate you are to resolve this. Your motivation will help you but you need to be clever about this - take a deep breath and approach this calmly for a just a moment. You will need to ask for references from previous clients who have been helped with trauma. Ask lots of questions and only go with someone if you feel happy with them.

Take out the phone book and ring around everyone you can find. Dont settle for someone if you are not sure about them.

As for amnesia, memories can never be completely erased. You can block yourself from consciously having the memories. They can still affect you though except that you will have nothing to attribute them to...

Please keep going!

Thanks for your post. I am so ready to get over this whole thing( dont want to waste another day of my life).. I asked some people I know and they where of no help!! So I went through the phone book and called almost all of them.. Some didnt do NLP some didnt deal with trauma. I found one that said they deal with this kinda stuff. We where talking on the phone and she said am I jills son It was weird because I didnt say my name or last name or anything . I was just explaining what was going on and if she can help( it was strange). She had known my mom for like 10 years.. Well anyways she said she has delt with similar stuff like this and felt like she can help me . I hope she can but the first session really did not do much. I have another session on Tuesday. I am so fed up with begin a emotional wreck I just want to somehow get some relief . It just feels like I am so controled about spefic memories the keep replaying that I am have such a hard time functioning. I cant keep focus on anything . Little task like just picking something to eat are so hard for me to do.. I am so worried about losing my santiy over this and dont know what to do. I am just laying around everyday with my mind just replaying the past. i have tried everything to make this stop over the past to years with no luck and now it has consumed me to the point where I cant even function.. Do you think that I should have felt a little better after only one session with the right person? Or can it take sometime to work?? I am open to finding somebody else if this person is not the right one.. Thanks for all you guys help . I just am so sick of this feeling and trying my hardiest to get back to normal...

[teadaze]

Hi Body,
If you come away from a hypnosis session not feeling positive about the experience then the hypnotist is no good! It is clear from your post that you have not yet found someone suitable to help you.
Ring around and speak to some previous clients. Check, check and check. Get a guarantee....if they cant give you one then move on! Check some more.
good luck

[Neil]

You might want to try EFT, (Emotional Freedom Techniques) it’s highly effective in cases of trauma, the concept sounds bizarre, but it real does work. You can go on this website http://www.emofree.com/default.htm and download a free manual and try it out. The great thing I like about EFT is that there is no need of a sales pitch, or parting with money. Just download the free manual and try it, absolutely nothing to lose and a lot to gain. It basically an offshoot of TFT Thought Field Therapy, which was designed for trauma, phobias and anxiety. Basically you focus on your issue and then tap acupuncture points in a particular order. Sounds nuts I know and I wouldn’t believe it unless I tried it and it worked for me. There’s even an offshoot of this now using hypnotherapy and EFT together.

[teadaze]

Hi Neil,

I know EFT works. I would not recommend learning it from the internet though, especially for something like this.

There is likely to be multiple issues here and without someone who knows what to look for and what questions to ask it may very well end in dissapointment. It is a very simple and very effective therapy but not always as basic as concentrating on the issue and tapping the points.

[body11]

You might want to try EFT, (Emotional Freedom Techniques) it’s highly effective in cases of trauma, the concept sounds bizarre, but it real does work. You can go on this website http://www.emofree.com/default.htm and download a free manual and try it out. The great thing I like about EFT is that there is no need of a sales pitch, or parting with money. Just download the free manual and try it, absolutely nothing to lose and a lot to gain. It basically an offshoot of TFT Thought Field Therapy, which was designed for trauma, phobias and anxiety. Basically you focus on your issue and then tap acupuncture points in a particular order. Sounds nuts I know and I wouldn’t believe it unless I tried it and it worked for me. There’s even an offshoot of this now using hypnotherapy and EFT together.

I want to thank everyone for all the help they are offering me.. Today has been awful ( not sure why but I feel worse cant eat and just dont feel right... ) I am willing to try anything to make this work.. Of course in a well mannered way. When I went to my hypnotists the other day she made a tape of the session. I have listened to the tape three times now with no noticeable relief.. I am the type of person that like to really research things and understand exactly how they work. For some reason something is telling me not do read into this hypotionist / trance thing as I feel if I do read into it to much it can hinder my results( not sure if I am correct on this ) . So I want top leave it to someone who has lots of experience in this field.. I do feel that this board is a blessing and that the advise given here will end up begin a huge help to me.. Does anyone else have any types of hypnotism that they suggest could help get my life back.. I have not been able to get out and do much as I feel so awful all the time . I am just basically at home laying around everyday. I know it will help if I can get out and somehow get back into living but I feel so bad and my mind just keeps replaying every past memory of my ex girl every minute( it is like a loop of diffrent memories that keeps replaying) making me feel worse . I am wondering why I cant shake these past memories so they dont control my life ( whats wrong with me??) Sorry to keep dragging this thread on I just really need some solid advise and truly feel it can be found here.. Thanks again guys!!

[Merlin]

I'm confused.
Is there any reason you gave the first story?
Is it somehow connected to the second?

[Merlin]

>Do you guys think NLP can help me with this ...

It probably could.
However, I would turn to Time line therapy (tm) first, then hypnosis second.
NLP would be my third choice.

[body11]

>Do you guys think NLP can help me with this ...

It probably could.
However, I would turn to Time line therapy (tm) first, then hypnosis second.
NLP would be my third choice.

Thanks for your post.. I posted about my home invasion because i am sure it is still affecting me in some way.. I am just finding it harder to deal with the whole ex thing .. I am not sure it is a mix of both bad memories... I will try what you have suggested .. Thanks again for your post!!!

[body11]

>Do you guys think NLP can help me with this ...

It probably could.
However, I would turn to Time line therapy (tm) first, then hypnosis second.
NLP would be my third choice.

I just called the hypotionist I saw the other day to ask about TLT. She said time line would not work ( gave some reason that didnt make any sense) . Well she said that if the tools she used during our session ( one was making a tight fist with my left hand to bring back a good feeling she used during hypnosis ) Didnt work them she does not suggest a hypnotists can help me.. She said she thinks I need something stronger like meds.. Well I am really aggravate with this I dont think she is correct. I have tried meds in the past and they made me worse.. I really dont need to get anymore upset than I already am... Can someone please give my some opinions as why hypnosis might not be able to help me with this or is this just incorrect ? Thanks

[TaffyE]

She's wrong.

Find someone else

[Don]

Although I don't know anything about the hypnotist you contacted, I am going to assume that your description was accurate (sometimes we all can err) and therefore, I agree with Taffy.

In fact, I find the comments made by the hypnotist far more likely to be those of someone who is primarily a psychologist or psychiatrist, each of whom is skilled in their own fields but are often not very well trained in the extensive use of hypnotherapy. Therefore, they turn to other solutions--medicines--which is more in their healing paradigm.

IF I am correct about the nature of the person you contacted, it would technically be illegal of me to recommend going to someone who is extensively trained in hypnotherapy rather than primarily being a psychologist or psychiatrist.

However, if I were looking for a hypnotherapist, I'd look for someone who specializes in the field and not someone who implies that if the one thing he or she knows doesn't work, I should go on meds.

[Merlin]

Hypnosis works fine.
Not all hypnotists are competent.
Your hypnotist likely doesn't know/understand Time line therapy (tm)

[body11]

[quote=Don]Although I don't know anything about the hypnotist you contacted, I am going to assume that your description was accurate (sometimes we all can err) and therefore, I agree with Taffy.

In fact, I find the comments made by the hypnotist far more likely to be those of someone who is primarily a psychologist or psychiatrist, each of whom is skilled in their own fields but are often not very well trained in the extensive use of hypnotherapy. Therefore, they turn to other solutions--medicines--which is more in their healing paradigm.

IF I am correct about the nature of the person you contacted, it would technically be illegal of me to recommend going to someone who is extensively trained in hypnotherapy rather than primarily being a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Thanks for all the replies guys.. She is not a psychologist or psychiatrist she is a certified hypnotist thats why I didnt understand why she was saying I need something stronger than hypnosis ( like meds). I guess she is just not a good one( just my luck lol).. I will keep searching as I do feel hypnosis can be the thing that gets me through this.. Thanks again for the advise!!

[Don]

Good luck, Body.

I find her response of turning to drugs odd for a hypnotherapist, but sometimes it is difficult for a person to say, "I don't know. Let me send you to someone who is better than I am" and instead looks for an easy out.

Keep up your spirit! You will get help.

And do let us know what happens.